You Be You, I'll Be Me
In late elementary school, into junior high, and even early high school, I spent many days being mocked, teased, and in one case, threatened by my peers. Whether it was what I wore, my size, or even something as simple as how I carried my books to class, certain people always found a way to make insulting remarks towards me. Getting made fun of played a big role in how I viewed myself, especially in Junior High. I knew I was different, and didn't fit in.
In 7th grade, I spent the year learning about how other people thought of me. That became what I took as truth in my life. The ways kids mocked me, became the center of how I viewed myself. It is where I took my value.
The next several years, I spent as much time as I could, trying to be like others. I wanted to fit in so much, that I would try and change who I was to get people to like me. As I continue getting older, I still see those same lies coming back to me from middle school. I can hear those kids saying things to me like, "you wear __________," or "you are a bean pole." In my mind, it translates to, "you aren't worth my time." "You don't belong in a group." "You don't deserve to have any friends."
I knew when people were talking about me. I knew when I was an outcast. I knew when I didn't fit in. I knew when I wasn't wanted.
Over the past 9 years, I have had the opportunity to lead many different small groups from 5th grade - 12th grade. One of the small groups, I remember seeing these same lies come out in the boys in my group. It isn't something only I struggle with, it seems to be universal.
There is such a cultural pressure to fit in or meet the expectations people have for us. Unfortunately, this expectation is measured almost solely by comparison. As we begin comparing ourselves to others, we realize one of two things: (1) I am way better than that person, or (2) I'm not near a good as that person. As I look at those who are "not as cool" as I am, I begin building up pride, thinking more highly than I should. As I look at those who are "more cool" than I am, I begin envying them, and wishing I was them. This attitude and way of thinking through life filled me with false hope and disappointments.
God never intended me to be anyone but me. He never expected me to be the best at something he didn't make me good at. He tells us that he has a plan for each one of us. Even before we were born. He knit me together. He made me exactly who he wants me to be. God says, just be you.
I have spent so much of my life trying to be someone I am not. I have spent so much time trying to impress people for the sake of getting their attention. The crazy thing I've learned (which isn't crazy at all), the people whom I have been closest with, actually care about who I am, not what I look like, or if I am good at sports, or anything else.
How does your life look? Do you truly believe that God doesn't make mistakes? Do you believe that God created you exactly as he intended? Do you believe that God truly does love you for who you are?
God created us all as individuals. Don't waste your life trying to be someone else. The truth is you are not, nor will you ever be anyone else but you, no matter how hard you try. I don't say this to discourage you, but to encourage you. Once you realize that you are who you are, and remove the pressure of trying to be someone else, you gain the freedom of being who you truly are. You lose the stress of trying to live in the shadow of someone else. You gain the joy of knowing that you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
I once heard this quote that reads, "10% of life is events that happen to you. 90% of life is how you respond to it."
You only have so many hours, days, and years of life remaining. Do you really want to waste it trying to be someone else? Do you really want to waste it trying to get something you can't have? Paul reminds us in Ephesians 2:10, "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." God has prepared a specific plan just for your life. How can we fulfill our purpose, if we are so busy trying to become someone else?
To those who struggle and feel like they are alone. To the one who believes that no one cares. Know that there are people who truly care. You are NOT alone. Know that you have a Father in heaven, who doesn't only love you, but he likes you, just as you are. He wants to spend time with you, and you with him. Know that the same Father in heaven, created you exactly how he wanted you to be. My God doesn't make mistakes, on me, on you, or anyone else. Don't buy the lies you are told that keep you from being yourself. Don't let the expectations and desires of others keep you from becoming the man/woman God created you to be.
"Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11
In 7th grade, I spent the year learning about how other people thought of me. That became what I took as truth in my life. The ways kids mocked me, became the center of how I viewed myself. It is where I took my value.
The next several years, I spent as much time as I could, trying to be like others. I wanted to fit in so much, that I would try and change who I was to get people to like me. As I continue getting older, I still see those same lies coming back to me from middle school. I can hear those kids saying things to me like, "you wear __________," or "you are a bean pole." In my mind, it translates to, "you aren't worth my time." "You don't belong in a group." "You don't deserve to have any friends."
I knew when people were talking about me. I knew when I was an outcast. I knew when I didn't fit in. I knew when I wasn't wanted.
Over the past 9 years, I have had the opportunity to lead many different small groups from 5th grade - 12th grade. One of the small groups, I remember seeing these same lies come out in the boys in my group. It isn't something only I struggle with, it seems to be universal.
There is such a cultural pressure to fit in or meet the expectations people have for us. Unfortunately, this expectation is measured almost solely by comparison. As we begin comparing ourselves to others, we realize one of two things: (1) I am way better than that person, or (2) I'm not near a good as that person. As I look at those who are "not as cool" as I am, I begin building up pride, thinking more highly than I should. As I look at those who are "more cool" than I am, I begin envying them, and wishing I was them. This attitude and way of thinking through life filled me with false hope and disappointments.
God never intended me to be anyone but me. He never expected me to be the best at something he didn't make me good at. He tells us that he has a plan for each one of us. Even before we were born. He knit me together. He made me exactly who he wants me to be. God says, just be you.
I have spent so much of my life trying to be someone I am not. I have spent so much time trying to impress people for the sake of getting their attention. The crazy thing I've learned (which isn't crazy at all), the people whom I have been closest with, actually care about who I am, not what I look like, or if I am good at sports, or anything else.
How does your life look? Do you truly believe that God doesn't make mistakes? Do you believe that God created you exactly as he intended? Do you believe that God truly does love you for who you are?
God created us all as individuals. Don't waste your life trying to be someone else. The truth is you are not, nor will you ever be anyone else but you, no matter how hard you try. I don't say this to discourage you, but to encourage you. Once you realize that you are who you are, and remove the pressure of trying to be someone else, you gain the freedom of being who you truly are. You lose the stress of trying to live in the shadow of someone else. You gain the joy of knowing that you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
I once heard this quote that reads, "10% of life is events that happen to you. 90% of life is how you respond to it."
You only have so many hours, days, and years of life remaining. Do you really want to waste it trying to be someone else? Do you really want to waste it trying to get something you can't have? Paul reminds us in Ephesians 2:10, "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." God has prepared a specific plan just for your life. How can we fulfill our purpose, if we are so busy trying to become someone else?
To those who struggle and feel like they are alone. To the one who believes that no one cares. Know that there are people who truly care. You are NOT alone. Know that you have a Father in heaven, who doesn't only love you, but he likes you, just as you are. He wants to spend time with you, and you with him. Know that the same Father in heaven, created you exactly how he wanted you to be. My God doesn't make mistakes, on me, on you, or anyone else. Don't buy the lies you are told that keep you from being yourself. Don't let the expectations and desires of others keep you from becoming the man/woman God created you to be.
"Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11
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